tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-78321762719770387322024-03-08T10:18:44.597-08:00Daily JokeYou know what they say--a joke a day keeps the doctors at bay.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-70071860678411626582012-01-22T11:11:00.001-08:002012-01-22T11:11:23.345-08:00A man is in the car with his wife......when she says to him, "Honey, I just can't stand you're awful wordplay."<br />
"But it's habit dear," he says, "how would you expect me to stop?"<br />
"Whatever means necessary," his wife says.<br />
"No it doesn't," the man replies!Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-12212467962358121242012-01-22T11:09:00.001-08:002012-01-22T11:09:46.359-08:00A man goes to the doctor......with a banana in his ear, a carrot in one nostril, and a grape in the other, and tells the doctor, "I'm not feeling well."<br />
The doctor takes one look at him and replies, "Well clearly you're not eating right."Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-6984258761201566722011-12-07T13:21:00.000-08:002011-12-07T13:21:00.368-08:00A man walks...into his analysts office wearing nothing but saran wrap.<br />
His analyst looks at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-83579812899901223032011-12-07T13:20:00.001-08:002011-12-07T13:20:14.260-08:00Have you ever heard of a Freudian Slip?It's when you say one thing but mean your mother.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-47803359548481114932011-11-19T12:31:00.000-08:002011-11-19T12:31:13.473-08:00What do you call (IV)...a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no genetals?<br />
<br />
Still no fucking idea.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-3655268268633572742011-11-17T09:38:00.001-08:002011-11-17T09:38:33.025-08:00What do you call (III)...a deer with no eyes?<br />
<br />
No idea.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-47812382874684847282011-11-16T11:17:00.001-08:002011-11-16T11:17:52.157-08:00What do you call (II)...a man with no arms and no legs outside your door?<br />
<br />
Mat.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-59863760063639544532011-11-16T09:14:00.001-08:002011-11-16T09:14:38.691-08:00What do you call... a girl with one leg?<br />
<br />
Eileen.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-64647883797394316882011-11-14T11:16:00.001-08:002011-11-14T11:16:06.421-08:00Descartes walks into a bar...and the bartender asks, "would you like a drink?"<br />
Descartes says, "I think not" and *POOF* he was gone!Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-52196590986289720072011-11-11T11:32:00.000-08:002011-11-11T11:32:08.233-08:00Double postSince I'm going away for the weekend and wont be posting until monday, here's two:<br />
<br />
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!<br />
<br />
Whats Iron's favorite amusement park ride?<br />
Ferrous wheel.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-82433525133181805312011-11-10T13:10:00.001-08:002011-11-10T13:10:20.882-08:00A superconductor walks into a bar...the bartender says, "we don't serve your kind here."<br />
The superconductor leaves without any resistance.Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7832176271977038732.post-81158811671707273992011-11-09T17:07:00.000-08:002011-11-09T17:07:18.297-08:00Introduction:So I've decided to move this online because why not. Here is a list of what I've told so far.<br />
<br />
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</style> <div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span>What did one hat say to the other?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You stay here, I’ll go on ahead.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span>What did the monk say to the hot-dog vendor?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Make me one with everything</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span>…so the vendor makes the dog and accepts<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a $20.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After waiting a minute, the monk asks, “where my change?” The vendor replies, “change must come from within.”</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span>The monk then pulls out a gun and says “I said I wanted my change." "OK, OK," says the vendor, "but why does a monk carry a gun?" The monk responds, "my inner piece is a glock."</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;">5. Two atoms are walking down the street, when one says to the other, "I think I lost an electron." "Are you sure?" asks the second. "Yeah, I'm positive."</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;">6. Some helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The helium doesn't react.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;">7. A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "how much for a drink?" The bartender looks at him and says, "For you? No charge."</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;">8. Heisenberg was an awful lover--whenever he had the right position he never had the right speed, and whenever he had the energy he never had the time.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;">9. Man, entropy just ain't what it used to be.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"></div>Fexilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13340303863821733075noreply@blogger.com0